Maedelin and Aljon's Wedding

 

Ang panahon ang siyang makapagsasabi kung ano ang itinakda ng Diyos sa tao.  Ayon sa Banal na Kasulatan na mababasa sa Aklat ng Mangangaral 3:11, “Iniangkop niya ang lahat ng bagay sa tamang kapanahunan. Ang tao’y binigyan niya ng pagnanasang alamin ang bukas ngunit hindi binigyan ng pagkaunawa sa ginawa ng Diyos mula sa simula hanggang sa wakas.”

‘Di nga ba’t Maedelin at Aljon, walang makapagsasabi na maging magkasintahan kayo sapagkat limang taon ang tanda mo Aljon kay Maedelin at ni hindi mo man lang nasilayan Maedelin ang anino ni Aljon sa Camaligan National High School, na pareho ninyong Alma Mater, dahil noong tumungtong ka sa nasabing paaralan ay nasa kolehiyo na si Aljon. Di nga ba’t walang makapagsasabi na nagte-text kayo sa bawat isa sapagkat wala ka namang cellphone noong mga panahong iyon Maedelin? Ni hindi nga alam ng pamilya niyo na naging kayo na bilang magkasintahan noong August 20, 2012. Sino nga ba ang makapagsasabing magkabalikan pa kayo pagkatapos ninyong magkahiwalay at nagkanya kanya kayong tumahak sa landas ng pag-ibig ng ibang tao? Sino nga ba ang makapagsasabing may magaganap na kasalang ito sa kadahilanang ayaw mong magpakasal Maedelin habang hindi ka pa nakakapasa sa Licensure Examination for Teachers (LET). Di nga ba’t kahit na nakapasa ka na Maedelin sa LET ay napunta ka pa sa Cavite at doon nabagabag ang iyong kalooban na naiwan mo sa Aklan si Aljon. Doon mo na lamang napagtanto na ang iniisip mo palagi ay ang sarili mong pangarap habang si Aljon naman ay patuloy na nangangarap para sa inyong dalawa.

Labing dalawang taon ng pagmamahalan na ang lumipas at ngayon nga ay dumating na ang takdang panahon para sa inyo upang magkaisang dibdib. Itong ginaganap na kasalan ay maituturing na kaloob ng Diyos gaya na lamang noong nag-isip ng malalim si San Jose tungkol sa kasal nila ni Santa Maria nang biglang nagpakita ang isang anghel sa kaniya sa isang panaginip at sinabing huwag mangambang tanggapin si Santa Maria bilang kanyang asawa (Mateo 1:20).

Subalit Maedelin at Aljon, kung ang kasal na ito ay kaloob sa inyo ng Diyos, pakatandaan niyo pa rin na kailangan ninyong pangalagaan ang inyong pagsasama. Sa buhay mag-asawa, hindi puro saya ang buhay, sapagkat paminsan-minsan mararanasan ninyong masaktan ng patago. Ililihim ninyo ang pagpatak ng luha at pipiliting ngumiti kahit na nasasaktan. Sa buhay ng isang may asawa, makapagsisinungaling kayo na kahit alam ninyong nakakapagod na ang mabuhay, sasabihin niyo pa ring kaya niyo pa. Sa buhay mag-asawa, kadalasang iniiwasan ang pagtatanong kung mahal niyo pa rin ang isat-isa at minsan din nakakawalang gana ang sagutin ang ganyang uri ng tanong. Kayat Maedelin at Aljon, matuto kayong magdasal bilang mag-asawa. Kung pareho na kayong nanghihinaan ng loob, Diyos ang Siyang gagabay sa inyo. Kung hindi kayo marunong magdasal bilang mag-asawa, malamang makakalimutan ninyo ang Diyos at makapag-isip kayo ng masama ukol sa inyong kasal.

Maedelin at Aljon, sasabihin kong muli na pangalagaan ninyo ang inyong pagsasama, sapagkat sinabi mismo ng ating Panginoong HesusKristo sa Marcos 10: 9 at sa Mateo 19: 6, “Ang pinagsama ng Diyos ay huwag paghiwalayin ng sinuman.” Ibig sabihin lamang nito ay wag na wag kayong mag-isip o magtangka man lamang umisip na maghiwalay kayo. Hindi dapat pumasok sa isipan ninyo na baka nagkamali kayo ng pagpasiya na magsama bilang mag-asawa. Datapuwat magdasal kayo bilang mag-asawa.

Maedelyn, ipagdasal mo na hindi magbago ang pagtingin sa iyo ni Aljon. Bihira sa isang lalake ang manahimik na lamang habang nagmamahal ng tapat. Hindi rin lahat ng lalake ay nakakaunawa sa kilos o galaw ng isang babae. Pero si Aljon, likas na sa kanya ang pagiging matiyaga at subok na rin ang lawak ng kanyang pang-uunawa.

Aljon, ipagdasal mo rin si Maedelyn na sana ay maligaya siya sa iyo bilang kanyang kabiyak. Ngunit hindi ibig sabihin nito Aljon na ang kaligayahan lamang ni Maedelyn ang nag-iisang kanais-nais sa inyong pagsasama. Kailangan ipagpaalam mo rin sa kanya ang iyong pangangailangan at wag mo nang antayin na manghula pa si Maedelyn kung ok ka lang ba.

Aljon at Maedelyn, ipagdasal ninyo na panatilihin ng Diyos sa puso ninyo ang pag-ibig ninyo sa isat-isa at pagpalain Niya ang inyong pagsasama. Ipagdasal ninyo na makakaya ninyong panindigan ang pangakong ginawa ninyo sa isat-isa at sa Diyos na magsasama kayo bilang mag-asawa hanggang sa dumating ang kamatayan.

Sana Aljon at Maedelyn, wag ninyong iasa ang lahat sa tadhana. Ayon nga sa isang kasabihan, “Nasa Diyos ang awa, nasa tao ang gawa.” Ang kasal na ito ay biyaya ng Diyos sa inyo. Gawin ninyo ang lahat upang kayo ay maging biyaya sa isat-isa bilang mag-asawa, at ang pagsasama ninyo ay maging kalugod-lugod sa Diyos. Amen.

Sr. Sto. Niño de Kalibo 2025

 

On January 23, 1974, the headline in a local newspaper, Aklan Reporter, was about Kalibo protesting against Ati-Atihan held outside Kalibo. The protest was precipitated by the performance of a group of “ati-atis” in Ermita, Manila along the tourist belt on January 20, the same day the Ati-Atihan was held in Kalibo, Aklan. The Father of Kalibo Ati-Atihan, the late Mayor Federico O. Icamina himself said that the word “Ati-Atihan” is embodied in the copyright the municipality has acquired for exclusive right over a pageant depicting the custom and its origin, which deprives any other place to use the term “Ati-Atihan” in any celebration outside of Kalibo.

Many Kalibonhons today are not aware of this protest in 1974 to preserve Kalibonhons’s intangible cultural heritage. What some Kalibonhons thought that happened in 1974 was that “Ati-Atihan” became famous when an Ati-Atihan parade was brought to Manila by the Department of Tourism. But in our local setting, it was considered a violation of cultural rights and a misrepresentation being done without the sponsorship or permission from the Municipality of Kalibo. Yet the Department of Tourism then was just following its mandate to promote tourism since it was newly created in 1973 by virtue of a Presidential Decree (No. 189) issued by the late President Ferdinand E. Marcos Sr.

Tourism, for all its intents and purposes, creates jobs and generates income for host community. As more tourists spend their money, financial benefits redound to the host community. Sponsors, financial support and subsidies have become necessary to create and maintain a tribe or group and even to improve the way the celebration is made. This is why some decades ago, the celebration of Ati-Atihan became highly commercialized as banners, streamers and advertising flags of some products like beer, whiskey and all others could be seen in almost all places of Kalibo. But tourism is not just about money. It is also about the preservation of cultural legacy.

Thanks to the timely pastoral intervention of the then Bishop of Kalibo, Bishop Gabriel Villaruz Reyes who recommended sometime in 2002 or 2003 to the local government of Kalibo to change the name of the annual fest to Kalibo Santo Niño Ati-atihan Festival and not just Kalibo Ati-Atihan. Thus, it is officially called Kalibo Santo Niño Ati-atihan Festival. This official name of the annual feast echoes the reason for the celebration of Ati-Atihan in Kalibo, and that is the Child Jesus known to us as Sr. Sto. Niño de Kalibo. This act of the then bishop of Kalibo is actually a blessing in disguise. When the National Historical Commission of the Philippines and the National Commission on the Culture and the Arts declared that there is no Barter of Panay that ever happened between the Bornean datus and the Aeta Natives, it becomes clear that the reason for the celebration is the feast of the Sr. Sto. Niño.

Consequently, outside the Church, there has been an increasing demand for historical and cultural artefacts why we have the Ati-Atihan if not for the Sr. Sto. Niño. In fact, this is not the only concern outside the Church. Instead of inspiring other provinces, towns and cities to celebrate their feast the way Kalibonhons celebrate, Kalibonhons now imitate what is seen from the celebration in Big Cities like changing our drumbeats into that of the battle of the band; our “sadsad” is at times switched with modern dance steps; our “snake dance” seems outdated while concert at the park is well favored. Instead of preserving Kalibo’s cultural heritage, Ati-Atihan is now packaged as a product for sale. Tourists are enticed to join the Ati-Atihan to drink and dance, celebrating down the streets from dusk till dawn. If this phenomenon is not handled properly by Kalibonhons, our cultural fabric shall be disrupted by these changes. Our communal celebration as Kalibonhons shall be gone one day as we reduce ourselves into mere spectators and bystanders of the celebration.

On the part of the Church, however, we remain the same in celebrating the Kalibo Santo Niño Ati-atihan Festival -we celebrate it with the celebration of the Mass. The Mass is the source and summit of our entire Christian lives. Such is the reason why we have our nine days’ masses before the vesper’s mass and the Pilgrims’ Mass. But why do Catholics care to attend Mass on Feast days? Well, the Latin word for feast is “festes” or “festos” which means joy. Thus, we celebrate a feast to experience the joy that comes from God. We celebrate the feast of the Sr. Sto. Niño to share to others the joy that comes from the Child Jesus. We celebrate the feast with a Mass as it is through this sacrament that we receive Jesus. We receive the Body of Christ in consonance with His call to remain in His love (John 15:9-12). He further said, “I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and your joy may be complete.” In other words, our joy is not complete without Jesus; our feast is not complete without receiving Jesus in the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. Moreover, as a devotee of the Sr. Santo Niño de Kalibo, do not just be contented with your attendance at Mass during feast days. Rather, join the Diocesan Confraternity of Santo Niño de Kalibo headed by Mr. Bebot Lao, and attend the monthly Mass in honor of the Santo Niño de Kalibo. There is no need to wait for the Ati-Atihan to participate in the joy that God provides us. Instead, let Jesus be your joy. Remember, in 2021 and 2022, our “sadsad” and other major activities during the Ati-Atihan were cancelled in observance of minimum health protocols to prevent coronavirus from spreading, but we Kalibonhons still went to Mass during those days. We found our joy only in Jesus. And as we received the Body of Christ during communion, we felt complete in celebrating the feast of the Sr. Sto. Niño. My dear friends, anybody, Catholics or Non-Catholics may enjoy the celebration of Ati-Atihan. But only Catholics know that the real joy in celebrating the Ati-Atihan is the Sr. Sto. Niño, and our joy shall only be complete when we receive Him in the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass today and all the days of our life. May we preserve not only our cultural heritage but above all our strong religious belief on the Sr. Sto. Niño de Kalibo. Amen.   

Krystel Gayle and Christian Arvin's Wedding

Krystel and Arvin, beginning today, I ask you to remember or even memorize this Bible verse taken from 1 Peter 4:8, “Above all, let your love for one another be intense, because love covers a multitude of sins.” It is presumed that once a couple decides to get married, they do love each other. But not all married couples stay together in love. They separate. They are separated by sins such as adultery, concubinage, infidelity, drunkenness and gambling to mention a few. Sin interferes with the way the couple should love. It does not only hurt the offended spouse, but it even causes great harm to their marital relationship.

Krystel and Arvin, when love covers a multitude of sins, this does not mean that the offended party should ignore or condone any sin that is committed against him/her and their marital relationship. Rather, it means that the offended party is ready to forgive while the offending party repents and changes her/his ways. All these they do for the good of their marriage.  All these they can do with an intense love. An intense love is a love that is patterned after the love of Jesus. Jesus Himself said this, “Love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another” (John 13: 35).

I believe that both of you, Krystel and Arvin understand me as your Spiritual Director why I like you to keep in mind these words, “Above all, let your love for one another be intense, because love covers a multitude of sins.” Remember Arvin in 2015, the first time you saw Krystel in your school, you experienced the thrill of the so-called love at first sight. Though you watched her at the canteen during breaktime, you also watched her at the carinderia during lunchtime. Remember Krystel, you were a campus queen enjoying a celebrity status among your peers during those times. Aside from being famous, you still had the time to serve God being an active youth leader of the Sto. Nino Catholic Charismatic Renewal and Revival Community. It was during the Charismatic Community prayer meeting at the chapel of Saint Lawrence the Deacon that the two of you personally met.  It was at that time Arvin when you prayed to God that Krystel shall be your lifetime partner as if God destined the two of you to meet at the chapel. From then on, everything seemed to be okay between the two of you until in 2018, Arvin you committed a big mistake that could have ruined your relationship. But Krystel was kind enough to forgive you and you started all over again to win her trust. Thus, I quote to you this Bible verse, 1 Peter 4:8 that states, “Above all, let your love for one another be intense, because love covers a multitude of sins” to tell you to be always ready to forgive each other and change for the betterment of your relationships.

Arvin, you are now a married man. It does not matter now whether what you feel is love at first sight or not. What matters is that you stay in love at last sight or even at out of sight. Many men wanted to get Krystel’s attention, yet she has choosen you from among them. She has been faithful to you. Be faithful to her too. You can only be faithful to her when you are aware that God is watching you. So, pray every day to be mindful that God is always present in your marriage.

Krystel, you are now a married woman. Maintain your beauty, not only physically but above all spiritually. Pray to God that your husband Arvin always sees the beauty of having you as his wife. If you have to give him one reason to stay with you, that reason should be your love for God.

Arvin and Krystel, starting today, let your love for each other be intense. Amen.

Joseph and Chrisya’s Wedding

In 2016, there was this trend in social media wherein one who has liked a status of a Facebook user, would receive a message from that Facebook user. It so happened that Chrisya clicked the Like button on Joseph’s status on Facebook, and so in turn, Joseph started to send chat messages to her. This was how everything started between the two. And just like any other love stories, they started to communicate with each other as friends. Then their friendly communication led them to a deeper knowledge of themselves and became intimate. Joseph would give a hint of his feeling towards Chrisya by saying to her that she is cute and he wants to hug her. He even brought a heart-shaped cake as his gift to Chrisya on one Valentine’s Day showing his romanticism. When Chrisya met an accident, Joseph never left her. As days passed by, they learned to love each other. Now they are here in our midst and before God to testify that they do love each other for better, for worse, until death sets them apart. Joseph and Chrisya, to say this may sound easy, but when it comes to married life, love becomes more complex. It means love has many components.

Robert Sternberg, a psychologist, breaks down the components of love into three: intimacy, passion and commitment. For now, you have experienced intimacy and passion in your relationship. Intimacy speaks of your emotional attachment to each other. Passion is your experience of excitement to be with each other. With the presence of intimacy and passion in your relationship, Joseph and Chrisya, you now feel and think you are both ready for a commitment. Commitment is a choice to stay with each other no matter what you feel.

As I have said earlier, love becomes more complex in a married life because you cannot just stay in your marriage solely because you depend on what you feel; you also need to make a choice from time to time. When you feel happy or sad, shall you choose to stay with your spouse? When your spouse commits mistakes, shall you choose to forgive or hate him/her? These questions and all other similar questions may come across your minds as husband and wife, and you need to make a choice for the good of your marriage. If you cease to make a good choice, then another broken vow shall be added to the list of bad marriages.

Joseph and Chrisya, what do I mean by making a good choice? It is not a choice which appears to be good but a choice to follow the will of God for married couples; it is called God’s choice. God wills that what God has joined together, let no man put asunder (Mark 10:9). Thus, Joseph and Chrisya, you should make a choice to stay with each other no matter what you feel because this is what God wills for married couples. If you are consistent in doing good choices for the sake of your marriage, only then it can be said that you have a strong commitment in your relationship. To do this, both of you should call on God to bless you. Joseph and Chrisya, your love story may begin without mentioning God in your relationship. But your love story could not continue if you are unaware of the presence of God in your relationship. Human love has its own flaws and limits.  If you wish to love that lasts forever, then do love each other with the love of God. In 1 John 4: 7-8, it says, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.” Thus, Joseph and Chrisya, love each other with the love of God. Amen. 

Cressa and Nelson’s Wedding

Cressa and Nelson, since March 12, 2016 up to this day the two of you complete your eight years of togetherness. From a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, now you are going to raise the level of your relationship into that of a husband and wife.

In the Bible, the number eight often represents a new beginning, a new life, or resurrection. In Leviticus 12:3, an eight-year-old boy should be circumcised as circumcision is understood as a sign of covenant, agreement or special contract between man and God. But a new covenant, agreement or special contract was ratified by God’s only Son, Jesus Christ through His passion, death and resurrection. The resurrection of Jesus took place on a Sunday. And Sunday is referred to as the eight day.  It marks a new life, a new beginning and even a new covenant.

Cressa and Nelson, number eight is a significant number in the Bible and also it is significant for the both of you. You have been in your relationship for 8 years and 8 months before this wedding takes place. It all started when you Cressa was teaching at Tondog Elementary School and it happened that you were the teacher of Nelson’s younger sister. He got your cellphone number and you two began exchanging friendly conversations through simple text messaging. Then you Nelson expressed your good intention to Cressa to court her. It took a year for you to win her heart. He then formally and courageously visited your home on December 25, 2021. Well, the rest is history.

Now, you are forging a new covenant, a new agreement or a new contract. You are going to put the wedding rings on each other’s fingers. Your wedding rings symbolize that your love for each other is eternal, that in your love for each other, there will be no end. Putting your wedding rings together and you can come up with a figure of 8. This figure can remind you of love that is so mysterious, which has no beginning and has no end. Such love is only possible in God. Only God can love without beginning and without end being the Alpha and the Omega (Revelation 1:8) That is why you are here today in this church to receive the grace of God so that you can both love with the love that God gives you.  In loving each other with the love of God, what matters most to you is to live a quality conjugal life.

John 15:9-12 tells us this, “As the Father loves me, so I also love you. Remain in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and remain in his love. “I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and your joy may be complete. This is my commandment: love one another as I love you.

Nelson and Cressa, as you are about to seal a new covenant of love, you will also begin to live your new life -your married life. This means that you should think as a married couple, act as a married couple, pray together and put God first. Nelson and Cressa, if you believe that “the greatest gift in a relationship is finding someone who chooses you every single day”, please don’t forget to always thank the Giver who is God. As you appreciate the gift, be grateful to the Giver. If you fail to acknowledge God in your relationship, you will one day fail to choose to love each other.

Remember, both of you are God’s gift to each other, and both of you now offer each other before God, presenting yourselves as husband and wife with the promise that nothing can ever separate you until death.  Thus, Nelson, protect your wife, Cressa. Protect her even from yourself when you don’t feel good at times. Cressa, nurture your husband, Nelson. Be loving even if you are tired from your daily work in school. Do your best and God will do the rest.

 

 

Sheila and Karl Stephen's Wedding

 Sheila and Macmac -expectation is a belief that something will happen. But when reality does not match up to what you had hoped would happen, disappointment comes in.

Few years ago, when you were both in High School, Sheila you were so talented and intelligent yet you were underrated. In terms of popularity, you did not stand as a crowd favourite. Though you had good leadership skills, you were never elected as the head of the council in your senior years. Though all these caused you somehow your disappointment, you still managed to find another place to showcase your talents and skills; that place is the church and you grew up there as a better person.

Macmac, you enjoyed the prime of your life in the school. Almost all popular girls there desired to have you. Some boys at your age even envied you as they kept asking themselves on how to be like you. But when you decided to serve the church, you found its doors closed. You were disappointed then. Yet you chose to move on.

Sheila, when you were in college, you made a lot of sacrifices just to finish your studies. There were many promises made to you by people you trusted yet none became true. The difficulties you encountered on your first chosen course seemed to drag you down. All these caused you your disappointment; but then again, you found another course to take and you excelled going straight to your better state, a better career.

Macmac, when you were in college, you enjoyed not only the life you had but also the love of your life. You finished your studies without difficulty and everything seemed to go on smoothly with you. You were very sure of yourself in what you were doing. However, there were times you were a little bit disappointed as you waited for your employment as a seafarer. And when the long wait was over, you were happy with your career though sometime later had been disappointed in one thing which only you who should know it. While onboard, you chose to move on.

Sheila and Macmac, I let you recall all these because I want you to know that you have successfully dealt with your disappointments in the past. Both of you showed resilience. You could adjust easily to a distressing event. If you do not know how to handle disappointments, you will only become bitter; and bitterness ruins relationships. If you have lived with bitterness, this wedding would never take place. A person who is bitter, cannot truly love and even if he/she loves, he/she shall fail to be happy with his/her beloved because a bitter person is not happy at all. He/she is uncomfortable with happiness and cannot be happy for the other.

Sheila and Macmac, many married couples become bitter and they stop hoping to find happiness in their relationship. They wonder how they started out okay, but eventually something happened to trip them up. When it happens that you Macmac and Sheila are disappointed with each other, remember these words of Jesus -Remain in my love (John 15:10). This means that if you cannot give the love you used to give to your beloved, then give him/her the love that Jesus always gives you. As a newly wedded couple, you have to deal with your disappointments conjugally as husband and wife. As a Catholic couple, always remain in Jesus through your prayers and sacrifices. Pray every day.

If you do not remain in Jesus, if you fail to make prayer your priority as a couple, then you might one day end up entertain in your hearts and thoughts these words found in the case of Padilla-Rumbaua v. Rumbaua, G.R. No. 166738, quoting Dr. Tayag, “People love in order to be secure that one will share his/her life with another and that he/she will not die alone. Individuals who are in love had the power to let love grow or let love die – it is a choice one had to face when love is not the love, he/she expected.” This case reflects how the world values marital sanctity. The world reduces the sanctity of marriage into a mere option either to give up when disappointed or to go on when everything comes according to expectation. This is not what the Lord Jesus has taught us. What Jesus has taught us through an example of His life is for us to love even when it is hard. Jesus who was betrayed and died a brutal death on the cross was never disappointed in His apostles. Instead, He even showed them His love.  

Sheila and Macmac, learn how Jesus loves so that you can together overcome marital disappointments. Individually, you know how to handle your own disappointments in the past. But this time, everything becomes different. You are now husband and wife. You do not work alone but together as a couple. Look at how you raise your son Caleb. Individually, you can fulfill your role as parent. But Caleb does not need only one of you but both of you as he grows up.

Sheila and Macmac, I am saying all these to prepare you to the reality of married life nowadays. We hear of stories of toxic households. Toxicity in a family relations happens when one or all members in the household is/are bitter. One becomes bitter when he/she does know how to manage life’s disappointments. When it comes to handle marital disappointments, the two of you must remain in the love of Jesus. I advise you to always pray. Amen.

 

ASU Graduation 2024

 NON SCHOLAE SED VITAE DISCIMUS –this is the first Latin phrase which I learned from the seminary which is translated as, “Study not for school, but for life”. Taking it as my motto, I seek knowledge and skills not to please the world, but because I love to learn. Whether it takes place in a formal, non-formal or informal setting, my passion is to learn. I love to learn.

In my 43 years of being a student of various schools, I have had the privilege to meet all kinds of classmates from different walks of life and from different age levels, from the PhD program of Aklan State University to the Automotive Servicing NC 1 at Montfort Technical Institute. Being with them, I have learned:

For every graduating student who expects to receive a diploma, there is a non-graduate who thinks that a diploma does not guarantee success.

For every graduating student who gets an award, a ribbon or medal as a recognition for his campus leadership or for her intellectual prowess, there is a non-graduate who believes that even without an academic degree, there can be a better career in life like in the case of Albert Einstein, Steve Jobs or Bill Gates.

For every graduating student who reflects on how hard he works from the day of enrolment until the day of graduation, there is a non-graduate who in his early age works hard to earn a living.

For every graduating student who does a throwback of her experiences with her teachers, classmates and friends, there is a non–graduate who looks forward to get some hands-on experience and work opportunity due to family responsibilities.

For every graduating student who invests in education to anticipate a better financial security in the future, there is a non-graduate who prioritizes his present financial needs at least to meet the family’s current expenses.

For every graduating student who hopes to land a better job after graduation, there is a non-graduate who has given up her chance to go to school just to ensure her siblings receive a better education.

For one person who celebrates on his graduation day, there is another person whose body needs rest to prepare for a hard labor on the next day.

For every graduate who is thankful for the support she has received from her loved ones, there is an out of school youth whose sacrifices for the family go unnoticed and unappreciated.

My dear friends in Christ, I have further learned that each individual’s journey in life is different. Not all graduates thrive in life. Albeit, a non–graduate can succeed in life by leveraging his or her practical knowledge and skills.

But who will define success for us? If success is defined by others for us, we will get tired of meeting their expectations. Seldom do we realize why do we have to use the judgment we receive from others to measure our own worth.

Read the Gospel of John 19: 37: “They shall look at him whom they have pierced”. In the eyes of most people, Jesus was a complete failure because he was helpless when he died on the cross. What those people did not know, Jesus did what God willed him to do. He was obedient to death, even death on a cross (Philippians 2: 8 says). His death paves the way to success in saving us all from the evils of sin. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).

It is better then to learn what success is from the ways of Jesus. Success is either doing what we love to do or loving what we can do with the help of God. In both, love matters. What is the point of success if we do not know how to love? Without love, we can never conquer the world. Without love, there is no real success. Suffice it to say that without love, there is no joy in graduating. My dear friends in Christ, let then this graduation be a mark of our success; But above all, a manifestation that we have loved until the end and for this we deserve to hear the word –Congratulations!

Mae and Jesse John's Wedding

Mae at Jesse John, sa mga sinaunang panahon, ang hinahanap ng lalake at babae bago sila magpakasal ay isang perfect love. Subalit sa dami nang ikinasal, ang malimit na maririnig sa mga mag-asawa pagkatapos ng ilang taon nilang pagsasama ay walang perfect love.

Mae, bilang professional teacher, alam mo na walang perfect sa buhay kaya nga’t may tinatawag tayong margin of error sa pagsasaliksik. Ang margin of error ay isang batayan na sa buhay ay may kakulangan o may magawang kamalian na maaaring tanggapin ng tao. Ang margin of error ay hindi ginagamit upang maghanap o magbilang ng kakulangan o kamalian. Ang totoong layunin kung bakit ginagamit ang margin of error ay ang tukuyin ang level of confidence o tiwalang kayang ibigay ng isang tao kahit may makita siyang mali o kakulangan.

Mae at Jesse John, kung susuriin ang pag-iisang dibdib niyo ngayon, mataas na level of confidence ang maibibigay ninyo. Galing kayo sa iisang barangay. Magkaeskwela o schoolmate kayo mula sa elementarya hanggang sa makapagtapos kayo sa mataas na paaralan ng Camaligan. Pareho kayong mahilig manood ng K-Drama. Pareho kayong sumasabay sa mga trip o jokes sa bawat isa. Kaya nga’t ramdam niyo na close kayong dalawa.

Subalit kahit kayo ay malapit na sa isat-isa, hindi nagbabago at hindi mababago na walang perfect love. Di nga ba at naitanong mo Mae kay Jesse John baka may magagalit sa closeness niyo? Di nga ba’t parang mahirap paniwalaan na umakyat ng ligaw si Jesse John sa iyo, Mae? Di nga ba’t pinag-isipan mo pang mabuti Mae kung tatangapin mo si Jesse John kahit malayo siya sa isang ideal man mo noon? Di nga ba’t magka-opposite attraction kayo? At kahit kayo na bilang magkasintahan ay hindi niyo ito inihayag sa kahit sinuman at nararamdaman ninyo na magkaiba pala ang magkausap kayo sa personal kaysa sa chat. At kahit sa araw na ito kung saan naayos niyo na ang lahat sa inyo pero nagbabadya naman ang sama ng panahon at brownout. Ang mga pinagdaanan niyong iyan at lalo na sa paghahanda niyo sa inyong kasal na ito ay nagpapahiwatig na walang perfect life sa mundo. Sa buhay mag-asawa,  kahit marami pa silang ipon o may narating na sa buhay, may makikita pa ring kakulangan kung hindi kamalian.   

Mae at Jesse John, kung walang perfect love, ano ang silbi ng kasal? Sa kasal, ang hinahanap natin sa isang babae at sa isang lalake ay ang true love. Sa panahon natin ngayon na laganap ang fake news, ang hanap natin ay isang tunay na pag-ibig. Ang tunay na pag-ibig ay hindi mapanlinlang. Hindi rin ito isang huwad o di kaya ay kathang isip lamang. Ang tunay na pag-ibig ay yong di umaayaw kahit ito ay nahihirapan; hindi bumibitaw, kahit ito ay pinaghihinaan ng loob; umaasa kahit nagugulumihan, nagmamahal pa rin kahit sa gitna ng kadiliman, at higit sa lahat, kahit gustuhin niyo mang pakawalan ang isat-isa, ayaw ng Diyos na mangyari ito sa inyong dalawa. Ito ang tunay na pag-ibig.

Mae at Jesse John, alam niyo ang ibig sabihin ng tunay na pag-ibig. Noong taong 2019, di nga ba’t muntikan na kayong sumuko sa tindi ng pagsubok na dumating sa inyong buhay upang suriin Ninyo ang inyo kakayahan at kahinaan? Ngunit heto kayo ngayon sa awa ng Diyos, upang ipahayag sa mundo na may tunay ngang pag-ibig. May tunay na pag-ibig kay Jesse John, Mae. Mae, tunay kang umiibig kay Jesse John. Mae at Jesse John, itinakda talaga ng Diyos na ikasal kayo sa araw na ito. Ang May 29 ay maaring basahing May 2 – 9 (tu-nay). Ang 2 (two) ay kayong dalawa bilang mag-asawa at yong 9 (nine), ay ang mga buwan na bibilangin ninyo upang magkaroon kayo ng anak. Mae at Jesse John, ito ang araw na ginawa ng Panginoon sa mga may tunay na pag-ibig. Tanggapin ninyo na ang petsang ito ay isang hudyat na ang kasal na ito ay nabuo dahil may tunay na pag-ibig kayo sa isat-isa.

Ano ang PhD?

 

PhD ka? Doktor na ang tawag sa iyo? Eh di magsimula ka ng manggamot! Yan ang madalas kong marinig sa pagtatapos ko sa Doctor of Philosophy Major in Educational Management. Mabuti na nga lang at doktor na ako. Ayaw kung makipag-baliktaktakan sa mga taong malayo man ang narating sa buhay ayon sa kanilang paningin eh puno naman ng inggit ang buong katawan at walang galang. Walang gamot sa inggit at makitid ang utak. Ang sabi ng dati kong professor sa philosophy, the late Msgr. Adolpo P. Depra PhD, ang paksang pinag uusapan ng tao ay tumutukoy sa kung anong utak mayroon ang tao. Ang pinakamababang uri ng paggamit ng utak ay ang pagtatalakay ng buhay ng ibang tao upang may mapag-usapan na ikasisira nito. Ngunit ang mataas na antas ng paggamit ng utak ay sumusuri ng ideya at pinalalawak ang isip upang makabuo ng mga gawain sa ikabubuti ng karamihan kung hindi man ito para sa lahat. Sa pagsasaliksik gamit ang utak, ang PhD ay pinakamataas na baitang na mararating ng isang tao kaya ang tawag sa sinumang nakarating rito ay doktor. Ako ay Doctor of Philosophy at hindi Doctor of Medicine, kaya’t isang kamangmangan o di kaya ay kahangalan ang sabihing maari na ako manggamot ng anumang uri ng sakit ng katawan. Kung meron man akong gagamutin, iyon ang mga utak na nagnanais na may mapag-aralan sa buhay. Ang gamot sa kamangmangan ay kaalaman.

Kaalaman –yan ang dahilan kung bakit kailangang mag-aral ng mag-aral. Sa simula ng klase namin sa Ed 103, tinalakay agad ni Doc Ersyl T. Biray ang paksang, “What a PhD is and what it is not.” Marami kasing nagsasabi na ang ibig sabihin ng PhD ay “Puro Hangin ang Dala.” Maaring totoo ito sa iba, ngunit hindi sa pangkalahatan. Sa mga naging kaklase ko sa PhD, mula sa simula hanggang sa katapusan, wala akong narinig sa kanila na kahambugan. Ang tanging masasabi ko kapag nakasama sila, “may mayad nga tinu-an, may mayad nga batasan.” Lahat sila ay kilala kung hindi man tanyag sa kanilang pinaglilingkurang paaralan. Manghang-mangha ako sa galing na taglay nila. Maraming wala sa akin na mayroon sila ngunit sila na mismo ang kusang umalalay sa akin upang hindi ako mawala. Kahit pa man sa paniniwala ay magka-iba kaming lahat, malaking pasalamat na ang bawat isa ay nakakaunawa.

Hindi madali ang PhD. May mga kaklase akong may asawa’t anak. Mahirap ipagkasya ang oras nila tuwing sabado at linggo sa pamilya at pag-aaral. May mga nakatira pa sa malalayong lugar. Mahirap magbyahe sa kanila lalo na ang karamihan ay nagmomotorsiklo. May mga gawain sila sa kanilang mga pinapasukang paaralan, ngunit kailangan magpuyat para sa research at reporting. Hindi lang utak ang napapagod kapag nagnais mag PhD kundi ang buong katawan. Higit sa lahat, mahirap kung kukulangin pa sa pera. Hindi pa naman mababawi ang nagastos na pera at sakripisyo kahit nakapagtapos na. Ngunit salamat. Nakaraos din naman. Kung hindi lang masaya makasama ang mga kaklase ko, sa unang araw pa lang ako ay sumuko na. Ang PhD pala ay hindi sagisag o titulo lamang; at ang makakaalam kung ano ito ay ang mga nakapagtapos at pinarangalan ng PhD sa pangalan nila.

Gerome and Tintin's Wedding

 

Many youth or young adults of our time find it difficult to serve the Lord. Thanks to the Youth for Christ, as it helps the youth or the young adults experience conversion to Christ and provides venue for them to serve the Lord.

Today, the family and friends of Gerome and Tintin including the two themselves are extra-thankful to the Youth for Christ because it is through the Youth for Christ that Gerome and Tintin met. Their collaboration also started there in the Youth for Christ as Chapter heads. Their Christian duty then was to lead others to Christ. Yet, everything between Gerome and Tintin was not only about their functional relationship as Chapter heads. There was a time that Gerome tried to build a personal relationship with Tintin. He did not want to end the story of their close partnerships from where they started -the Youth for Christ. They were both unaware that their functional relationship in Youth for Christ was just a prelude to their personal relationships.

In other words, as they have fulfilled their Christian duty to lead others to Christ, unknown to them is that Christ actually leads them to each other. This is not something new for those who serve the Lord. Those who serve the Lord expect not a romantic love story but one which is Biblical.  Let me explain this to you Gerome and Tintin by quoting from the Second Letter of Peter (1: 5-8) that states: “For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith, with virtue, virtue with knowledge, knowledge with self-control, self-control with endurance, endurance with devotion, devotion with mutual affection, mutual affection with love.”

Gerome and Tintin, reflect on your love story. Reflect on how you started in Youth for Christ until now that you are here at the altar of the Lord as a couple for Christ.

In the Youth for Christ, you worked together to express your faith. It is because of your virtues that you have become its Chapter heads. When you Gerome tried to court Tintin, Tintin, you told him that you prioritized your studies. Thus, Tintin, your pursuit of knowledge paved the way for self-control. Tintin’s self-control gave you Gerome the gift of endurance to face Tintin’s parents to show your devotion to her. From then on, both of you Gerome and Tintin shared freely not only your mutual affection but also your love. This is your love story, and it is indeed Biblical. Try to read the said Bible verse after this wedding to remind you that your marriage is made in heaven. But this does not mean that you do nothing in your married life. Rather, make your wedding the best part of your long story of love.

To end, Gerome and Tintin, let your wedding be also a manifestation of a spiritual truth expressed in 1 Corinthians 13:13. There are three things that last -faith, hope and love. Starting today, Gerome and Tintin, be a living proof that the greatest among the three is love. Let love be always in your hearts.

Historical Revisionism of the Feast of the Sto. Niño de Kalibo

 

When the Federation of Aklan Ati-Atihan was established, one of its primary objectives was the preservation, development and promotion of the famous Ati-Atihan, Ati-Ati or Ate-Ate as an intangible cultural heritage of Aklanons. The Federation was in coordination with the National Commission for Culture and the Arts. The initial steps they made included the compilation of accounts revealing how the Ati-Atihan, Ati-Ati or Ate-Ate came to be in the whole province of Aklan. Surprisingly members of the Federation included Altavas, Ibajay, Makato, Lezo, Kalibo, Banga and Numancia. Among the towns in Aklan, only Ibajay, Kalibo and Batan traced the origin of their celebration as far back as the early Spanish period in the Philippines. It is interesting to note that these three are the oldest towns in the province as Batan was founded in 1601, Ibajay was founded in 1596 and Kalibo was founded in 1581. Another interesting thing to note is that all Akeanon Bishops hailed from the ecclesiastical jurisdiction of these three towns. The late Bishop Ciceron Santa Maria Tumbocon was from Ibajay. The Late Archbishop Gabriel M. Reyes and Bishop Gabriel V. Reyes were from Kalibo. Then the late Cardinal Jaime Sin and Bishop Raul Martirez were from New Washington. New Washington was once a visita of Batan, just as Tangalan where Bishop Jose Corazon Tala-oc was born was formerly a visita of Kalibo. Among the three, only Kalibo and Ibajay have shown their uniqueness both in their drumbeats and the “sadsad” (dragging one’s feet as a ritual dance). There is no doubt that these towns are both original in their music and dance by way of playing their drums and doing the “sadsad”. In both towns, there is a fast-jogging type of “sadsad” which is done in high knees. But there is also this “sadsad” done with small steps. In Ibajay one takes a very short pause in doing the “sadsad” while in Kalibo, there is no such a pause. In terms of drumbeats, Ibajay is faster than that of Kalibo. With regard to the origin of the celebration, the Federation of Aklan Ati-Atihan collected some accounts as their supporting documents to be forwarded to the National Commission for Culture and the Arts. Ibajay has shared only one account which includes the retelling of event when Christian armies defeated the Moors. But Kalibo has shared various accounts and the most popular and well-adapted story is that of the Barter of Panay. The adaptation of the Barter of Panay as the origin of the Kalibo Ati-Atihan was an attempt to predate any festival or feast introduced during the Spanish Period. Nonetheless, the Federation of Aklan Ati-Atihan lived only shortly after its decade of existence. It did not finish what it started. Its compilation was later borrowed by an individual who made use of them in her writings. The Federation never made its observations or findings publicly known particularly on the when, why and how the Ati-Atihan, Ati-Ati or Ate-Ate came to be.

Obviously in Kalibo, Ati-Atihan formally started during the time of Mayor Icamina. But before it was called “Ati-Atihan”, it was known as “ga-Sto. Niño” in Kalibo. Ati-Atihan as being called today by many was but a way of celebrating the feast of the Sto. Niño in Kalibo since time immemorial. It was with drumbeats and “sadsad” that Kalibonhons celebrated the said feast. The word “Ati-Atihan” was never used because Kalibonhons were simply celebrating the feast of the Sto. Niño. There was no need for a “label” then to describe what Kalibonhons were doing during the feast. The purpose of the celebration was for panaad and not for tourism. The celebration then in Kalibo was not even an “Ati-Atihan” because mostly, people used costumes like mummies, zombies, an indigenous/ate (and there was one individual carrying a cross!), etc. that it was described as a Mardi Gras-like celebration.

When Mayor Icamina gave birth to “Ati-Atihan”, the masquerade ball type of celebrating the feast of the Sto. Niño was reduced to forming Ati tribes. The way the feast of the Sto. Niño was celebrated in its new name, Ati-Atihan became “instant” famous. With its celebrity status, the organizers of Ati-Atihan themselves had to explain the existence of Ati-Atihan. Because it is called Ati-Atihan, people associated its origin with the ate (aetas). But as cultural minorities, only true-blooded Kalibonhons who were born and live in Kalibo knew that seldom could one see an ate (aeta) in Kalibo. Most Ate (aetas) especially during the celebration of the feast of the Sto. Niño in Kalibo were from other towns or provinces. Yet some people propagated that because Ati-Atihan was associated with the ate (aetas), so the origin of the celebration could be traced back to the day when the one thousand ate (aetas) were baptized and that they celebrated their conversion with music and dancing. This version could be an attempt to preserve the religious aspect of the celebration. But Ati-Atihan as a celebration was totally separated from the celebration of the feast of the Sto. Niño when after the term of Mayor Icamina, the local government formed Ati-Atihan organizers without the active involvement of the church. Organizers focused much on the socio-cultural and tourism aspects of the celebration as they also came up with different versions of the origin of the Ati-Atihan, thus trying to give it the reason for its existence. But how could anyone prove the existence of an event which did not happen in the first place?

Only during the time of Bishop Gabriel V. Reyes that the voice of the church was again heard of. The local government unit heeded the exhortation of Bishop Reyes to call the celebration as Kalibo Sto. Niño Ati-Atihan Festival. But despite this attempt to bring back the religious significance and to re-claim the real reason for the celebration –for the feast of the Sto. Niño, profanity or making it a pagan festival becomes unstoppable. Tourists for tourism’ sake is given importance over the local religious Kalibonhons’ devotion to the Sto. Niño. The last time that a grand procession was made solemnly mostly by devotees of the Sto. Niño was in 2005 when most tourists fled to other tourist destinations because of the shooting rampage that occurred after the Pilgrims’ mass. After that year, Ati-Atihan has regained its worldwide fame and a thousand of tourists have come and joined the celebration while the Sto. Niño de Kalibo has just been left to a number of devotees. It is like enjoying a birthday celebration though the guests do not care to know who the celebrator is.

The hour has come for Kalibonhons to expose the truth –the Ati-Atihan which most people know about was once a unique expression of devotion to the Sto. Niño by Kalibonhons. Tourism is good but our devotion to the Sto. Niño should be above all these. Say no to profanity and to the Sto. Niño be the glory. Viva kay Sr. Sto. Niño!

MUST BE READ ARTICLE

 

On June 19, 2005, I arrived at the Resurrection of Our Lord Parish, BF Homes Parañaque. I was assigned as a guest priest there. There were three scheduled daily masses then -5 AM, 6 AM and 5:30 PM. Being the youngest among the three priests at that time, I was assigned to take the 5 AM mass.

On my first week in the parish, a lector would invite me to have our breakfast at the Tropical Hut after the 5 AM mass. I refused. I was warned by the parish priest not to accept any invitation from anybody. But after sometime, the lector was able to convince me to have our breakfast at Tropical Hut upon knowing that she was the head of the Ministry of Lectors and Commentators –she is no other than the beloved lector or commentator, Ms. Letty Elayda. I learned from her that there were various breakfast clubs in the parish with which the previous priests used to join. After our breakfast, she would go back to the parish to serve again either as lector or commentator. The 2^nd mass was better because kuya Raffy was there with his choir and sometimes the nuns would also sing during the mass. There was no choir assisting during the 1^st mass, perhaps, because it was the only Tagalog Mass in the parish. (At times, the nuns of St. Francis of the 12 Circles joined me in singing during the 1^st mass)

It was my daily routine after my mass to have my breakfast at Tropical Hut with Ms. Letty until Tita Freda (owner of the bookstore at the PEA) and Ranny joined us. Tita Freda and Ranny were members of the Apostleship of Prayer. I met them when I prayed at PEA. They were regular daily mass goers (2^nd Mass). Sometimes, they invited me to eat breakfast with them after the 2^nd mass. Most often then, I had two breakfast meals in one day. One was with Ms. Letty after the 1^st mass and the other was with Tita Freda after the 2^nd mass.

On February 2, 2006, Tita Freda told me to attend a birthday party. I refused at first. But Tita Freda insisted that as a priest I should know my parishioners and it is not good to reject an invitation of the birthday celebrator. So I went to attend the birthday celebration of Ms. Baby Frias. It was my first time to get out of the parish just to be with the parishioners. The visitors were all surprised to see me because they did not know I was a guest priest since 2005. In fact, it was my first time to meet them too. I was introduced to the well-known breakfast club –Ms. Baby Bernabe, Ms. Baby Frias, Madam Auring, Ester Luna, Tita Matu, Tita Resie, Tita Bella, Tita Rosie, Tita Remy and Ms. Edi Posadas. I said “well-known” because though there were other breakfast clubs during those times, only with Ms. Bernabe’s club that we had our breakfast not only within the premises of BF Homes. We went as far as Tagaytay, Cavite, and other famous places or landmarks just to have our breakfast.

I could say with pride that when other parishioners learned that I was a guest priest, there was a formation of one or joint breakfast club. So Ms. Bernabe’s club became bigger as Tita Freda, Ranny, Tita Norma, Tita Betty, Ms. Tess Lopez and sometimes Ms. Brenda, Ms. Minie and Ms. Connie joined us in our breakfast. Name all the best restaurants in BF Homes which were opened for breakfast –we were there. Restaurants which were newly opened at that time as well as those which were declared close –we were there. Unfortunately, our cellphones did not have a built-in camera then. Yet, madam Auring had her own camera and she would give us pictures for the sake of remembrance.

People come and go. Perhaps this is part of the process of evolution.

This is also true to the “Breakfast Club”. Sometime in 2007, the Breakfast Club had some new members –Ms. Polly, Tita Linda and Ms. Tess Diokno while some of its old members formed their own group. Ms. Bel Ferraren joined the club lately though not consistently present in our daily breakfast activities. This was the Breakfast Club I left when I went back to the Diocese of Kalibo.

In 2015, I went back to ROLP for my Bar review. There were only two breakfast clubs left –one was that of Ms. Bernabe and the other was that of Tita Betty. This time, both clubs chose to eat either in Café France or in Jollibee. I alternately joined them in their breakfast. The members of Tita Betty’s club were Tita Norma, Tita Rosie and Ate Mely while of Ms. Bernabe were Ms. Baby F., Ms. Bel, Madam Auring, Ms. Polly, Tita Linda, and the new ones were Tita Belen, Tita Analyn and Ms. Monette Santos. Café France and Jollibee were my most comfortable zones to review for the Bar Exam from breakfast time to lunchtime and at dinner time until midnight, I was at Starbucks. I loved noises while studying. Ms. Sol Algarra would ask me how would I pass the bar exam if all I was doing was to study in those places. On the later part of my stay (2016), I was introduced to their gorgeous new member –Ms. Mhaila, then to the youngest member Sheila at Tim Hortons.

On July 22, 2022, I came to visit friends in ROLP. I learned that the once well-known and the most famous breakfast club that I used to join with is presently known as the Jollibee Breakfast Club in the parish. Maybe this happened because there is no more Café France in BF Homes. They are the oldest surviving Breakfast Club or the only and one Breakfast Club left as Tita Betty, Tita Rosie and Tita Norma died before the Pandemic era. Parishioners who knew me thought that I would be having my daily breakfast with the club. But NO. Not this time. I may call this as the evolution of the Breakfast Club to a lunch date because we ate lunch together at Aroi Original Thai Dishes instead of having a breakfast. Upon conversing with them, I felt how the pandemic changed their life. Most of them could not go out being senior citizens. Madam Auring suffers from her knee injury. Tita Linda was afraid of COVID-19. All of them are not getting younger. Many of them were not able to join our lunch date yet they sent me some gifts to remind me of our friendship. When we finished our lunch, I bade goodbye.

I do not know when shall I come back again to visit ROLP. I am not getting younger so do are my friends in ROLP particularly the Breakfast Club. The only reason why I keep visiting the place is the friendship which the parishioners of ROLP offered me and the Breakfast Club was the first one to make me feel that I AM NOT A STRANGER in ROLP. Yes, I still have many friends in ROLP aside from the Breakfast Club. I could also memorize their names and faces though I left the said parish in 2007. But the Breakfast Club is unique for they have been with me since 2005 and no intrigues against my honor and reputation has been entertained because they know me, yet they love me. Nevertheless, aging is a game changer for all of us. We cannot do anymore what we used to do before. The Breakfast Club could not escape such a reality; not even any of us could do so. But what matters most –I will be forever grateful to know that in a strange land like ROLP, I used to have a home in my friends’ hearts starting from the Breakfast Club and extending to those who call me their friend. Amen.

5th Sunday of Easter

 

Ano ang kabaligtaran ng “LOVE” o pag-ibig? Ang karamihang sagot ay “hate” o poot o galit. Kaya’t may maririnig na bagong kasabihan sa radyo, “Love lang, walang hate”. Ngunit bakit may nakakaranas ang iba sa atin ng galit at pagmamahal sa isang pagkakataon? Gaya na lamang ng isang babae na nahuli niya ang kanyang asawa na nangangaliwa. Galit siya sa kanyang nagkasalang asawa ngunit ayaw niyang makipaghiwalay dito dahil gaano man kasakit ang kanyang naramdaman hindi niya maipagkaila na mahal pa rin niya ito. Pangkaraniwang karanasan din natin na kahit mahal natin ang ating mga magulang, mga anak, mga kapatid at kaibigan, may mga oras na tayo ay naiinis o nagagalit din sa kanila. Ang “love” o pag-ibig ay nagpapahayag ng magandang pakiramdam. Ang “hate” o galit naman ay nagpapahayag ng hindi magandang pakiramdam. Kung ang “hate” at “love” nga ay magkabaligtad, ito ay dahil sa ang isa ay masama at yong isa naman ay maganda.

Pero kung susuriin, ang masasabing kabaligtaran ng “love” ay “non-love” o walang pakiramdam (pagwawalang-bahala). Gaya na lamang ng isang babae na nahuli niya ang kanyang asawa na nangangaliwa. Galit siya sa kanyang nagkasalang asawa ngunit ayaw niyang makipaghiwalay dito dahil gaano man kasakit ang kanyang naramdaman hindi niya maipagkaila na mahal pa rin niya ito. Pero yong nagkasalang asawa, hindi man lang nakaramdam kung gaano kasakit sa babae ang kanyang ginawang kamalian. Hindi siya nagagalit kahit sigawan, sumbatan at sampalin siya ng babae. Walang kaugnayan ang nararamdaman niya sa nararamdaman ng babae. Ang kawalan ng pakiramdam sa panig ng lalake ay isang pagpakita ng kabaligtaran ng “love”, ang “non-love.” Masasabing mabuti pang makita ang isang asawa na nagagalit dahil ang ibig sabihin lamang nito may pakiramdam pa siya sa kanyang kabiyak kahit papaano. Mas masakit ang pagsasawalang bahala kaysa sa pagalitan sapagkat parang ipinaparamdam nito na patay na ang isang tao kahit buhay pa ito. Ang “hate” ay isang reaksyon subalit ang “non-love” ay kawalan ng reaksyon.

Magkaganoon pa man, hindi itinuro ni KristoHesus sa mga sumusunod sa Kanya ang “non-love” at lalo na hindi Niya itinuro ang “hate”. Ang itinuro ni KristoHesus ay “Love lang, walang hate”. Ang sabi nga Niya, “Isang bagong utos ang ibinibigay ko sa inyo, kayo ay mag-ibigan sa isa’t isa”. Ngunit ang pag-iibigan na iniutos ni KristoHesus ay higit pa sa pagkakaalam ng mundo kung ano ang pag-ibig. Ang sabi nga ni KristoHesus, “Kung papaanong inibig ko kayo ay gayundin naman kayong mag-ibigan sa isa’t isa”.  Ang pag-ibig ni Hesus ay hindi isang magandang pakiramdam, kundi ito ay isang pagnanais ng ikabubuti ng lahat at kakayahang ibuwis ang buhay kung kinakailangan. Ang pinanggalingan ng pag-ibig na ito ay si KristoHesus mismo hindi sa kung anong magandang pakiramdam. Ang ibig lamang sabihin nito, kahit ano pa ang nararamdaman ng isang tao, ang pag-ibig ni KristoHesus ang Siyang dapat mangibabaw. Sa isang nangaliwang asawa, kahit pa na ramdam niyang mahal niya ang kanyang kinakasama, mas pipiliin niyang balikan ang kanyang asawa at pamilya dahil si KristoHesus ang pinanggalingan ng pag-ibig na nasa puso niya. Kung may ganitong uri ng pag-ibig sa lahat na may asawa, mayroon pa bang makapag-isip na makipahiwalay sa kanila?

Ang matatag na relasyon o pagsasama kahit sa magkaibigan o magkapatid, hindi nasusukat sa kahusayan o kadalubhasaan ng bawat isa kundi sa kanilang kaugnayan kay KristoHesus. Walang matibay na relasyon, kung wala si Kristo sa kanilang determinasyon. Kaya nga’t si KristoHesus mismo ang nagpapaalala: “Sa pamamagitan nito ay malalaman ng lahat ng mga tao na kayo ay aking mga alagad. Ito ay kung may pag-ibig kayo sa isa’t isa.” Kung totoong Kristyano nga tayo, dapat ang makikita sa atin ay: Love lang, walang hate. Amen.